I Love My Kids but they are Killing ME!

I love my kids more than anything else in this world. I mean it. I love seeing them in the morning when they first wake up and I love that they give me hugs and kisses goodnight each day. They are 5, 9, and 12 yrs old. They are all unique and they are all a hand full.
Sometimes though they just drive me up the friggin' wall and I have no escape!

Kid #1 12 yrs old - smart as can be scores unbelievably high on any test he is given but can't seem to remember to bring home or do homework! What is this all about? I mean he gets ACT (Assignment Completion Time) (otherwise known to real people as DETENTION!!!!) a few times each week. I ask if he has done his homework I check what he gives me, I check his "planner" to see what is written down (he is the one writing in it so of course not everything gets in there!!!!) but still he will lie through his teeth just to get out of 10 minutes of homework, WTF! I mean come on its not that hard and we live in ND so it's already cold as can be so just sit down and do the assignment and quit getting DETENTION!! oops I meant ACT for all those PC morons out there.

Kid #2 9 yrs old - smart as a whip. Hates doing any chores. I quiz this one on his school work or spelling and he makes me feel bad for wasting my time. How can a 9 yr old do that to a grown man? Make this kid study spelling or for a test for 15 minutes and you would think I just ran bamboo up under his fingernails! He gets them right though (uuggghhh). Ask him to do a chore anything at all, feed the dog or cats, clean his room (oh heaven forbid) or bring down his laundry and you have just declared war on a sovereign nation and he will retaliate with his full Nuclear arsenal. However if you stand in the room where said chore needs to be done he completes it cheerfully and out of sheer angst you praise him for such a good job.

Kid # 3 5 yrs old - spoiled spoiled spoiled, but I love her. This one has me wrapped around every finger on each hand, I try to be harsh when I need to, alot of good that does! I spent hours on end with her getting her ready for kindergarten flash cards, numbers, spelling, writing her name everything, address and phone number, she can recite them back to me with no problem at all then we get her report card and now she doesn't recognize letters, can't count past 5 (even though she came home and counted to 40 without missing a dang beat) and is not turning in assignments. Sounds like the 12 yr old already. Then she gets mad at me if we don't have daily snuggle time and tickle time for her. I mean she will throw down a fit the likes of which haven't been seen since Napoleon if she doesn't get her way. This little one may just one day rule the world, hope you aren't on her bad side though!

So when all is said and done, I deal with the school stuff though it confounds my mind why they can't just actually do the work and turn it in!!!!! But I love them and their quirks lets just hope I am not raising those snotty brats I put up with every time I leave the house.

Thanks